License To Drive Review

By Jake Dee

Director: Greg Beeman

Starring: Corey Haim, Corey Feldman

Released: 1988

It’s hard to believe that many in Hollywood attained more fame in the mid to late 80s than Corey Feldman and Corey Haim. Kirk Cameron maybe; or a 21 Jump Street Johnny Depp perhaps! Teen idols the Coreys were quickly dubbed; their posters and magazine cut-outs strewn on the walls of many of little girls across the country. Beginning with The Lost Boys in 1987 (part deux is in the works apparently); Haim and Feldman went on to star in seven movies together all the way up thru the mid 90s. But like most young stars in the fast lane (Lindsay, Britney?), a spiral of self destruction would take its toll, eventually relegating their careers to straight to video B-movies and reality TV shows (anyone see that VH1 debacle?!?). But before the downfall, a little teen comedy called License to Drive came out.

As a child of the 80s, Greg Beeman’s 1988 release of License to Drive holds a nostalgic place in my heart. Is it a great movie? No! A good movie? Maybe not. Does it achieve what it sets out to do, namely making people laugh; I’m the first in line to cast an emphatic yes vote! Besides, I’ve always been partial to flicks that take place during the course of one day, especially comedies (Clerks, Friday etc.). But if nasty rat mullets and rolled up satin sleeve jackets don’t tickle your fancy you might want to avoid this one.

Here, we have Les Anderson (Haim), a 16 year old kid on the brink of acquiring his driver’s license. He’s not the coolest or geekiest guy in school, sort of in that painful adolescent grey area. Early scenes show him riding the dreaded school bus with pals Dean (Feldman) and Charles (Michael Manasseri). Les pines for school hottie Mercedes Lane (Heather Graham, in her film debut), conjuring up different ways to ask her out. At a party one night, Mercedes unexpectedly picks Les out of a crowd as a way to make her boyfriend, some grease ball who’s like 20 years older, jealous. She asks Les out more or less as a lark.

One day Les’ father (the hysterical Richard Masur), offers a surprise ride home from school. On their way home, Les spots Mercedes walking alone down an empty sidewalk. Somehow he convinces his dad to let him drive the pristine blue Cadillac by himself, license-less, just for a few minutes so he can drop Mercedes off at home a block or so away. Les ends up driving miles, forcing his dad to walk all the way home, a pile of groceries in his hands. Les locks a more concrete date with Mercedes for the following Saturday night.

Only Les doesn’t have his license yet, and has to compete with his near perfect sister Natalie (Nina Siemaszko). He underestimates the material, wings it on test day, and fails the writing portion of the exam. Out of anger, he slams his computer with his hand, causing the whole system to malfunction, losing everyone’s score. Then Les does surprisingly well in the near calamitous driving portion of the exam (some funny exchanges with a pre-Fresh Prince James Avery), and is rewarded a temporary license by a scary DMV worker (Helen Hanft). By days end, the test results are retrieved, and Les has his license torn up in front of his eyes.

Les lies to his family and friends though, saying he did get his license. Dean and Charles nag him to pick them up, go cruising about town like sixteen year old studs should. Then Les’ mother (Carol Kane) finds a failed exam notice in his jeans while doing laundry, ultimately leading to Les being grounded for two weeks. This puts his date with Mercedes in bind, no?!?

Not really! Les steals his grandfather Cadillac while his are parents asleep and heads off to the house of Mercedes Lane. Their rocky night of hi-jinks and awkward teen moments are cut short by Mercedes getting hopped up on a cheap bottle of champagne and passing out in the back seat. Les can’t speed to Dean’s house quick enough.

Dean straightens out a few fender dents on the Caddy so Les’ grandfather won’t notice any foul play. Then he and Charles persuade Les into going to Archie’s Atomic, the ultra haven of cool for any a teen; a place where hot waitresses in short skirts and roller skates hand deliver food orders to your car window, fifties style. Les resists at first, and then finally caves in. They stuff a hammered Mercedes in the largest car trunk you’ve ever seen, peel off down the road to Archie’s.

Along the way we run into a roster of odd ball characters including a first rate sot, sauced on tiny airline bottles of gin and what not. A gang of metal thrashing hard cores in a primer muscle car, a communist beatnik boyfriend, a grizzly over weight hick toe trucker, a sobriety road block, a host of militant protesters and a crabby old codger as Les’ grandfather. Combine all that with the inebriated performances of the two Coreys and we get a decent little knee slapper.

The styles and music alone are worth a solid chuckle. The teal or aquamarine body glove gear, the eight pound white high tops, those oh so tight acid wash jeans, Billy Ocean and Belinda Carlisle blaring at full blast. Notice how in nearly every single scene Haim has his mouth agape (the dope perhaps), looking lost; ready to catch a couple of flies. Ah…only in the ‘80s!

Overall Dee-Cision: Watch It!

Favorite Scene - Richard Masur sweating, panting out of shape as he walks all the way home after Les ditches him. The look on his face, his body language, the way he stumbles down the road, just too good!

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